317-Where Your Story Is Actually Hiding

Live Seminar this Wednesday--Click here for VIP Seat.

You have told your story before. The clean version, the one that skips the hard parts and lands on the win. But the woman who needs you is not waiting on your highlight reel. She is waiting on the part you keep leaving out.

In this episode, Theresa Croft shares four keys to finding the story that connects you with your ideal client. Where to actually look for your story, hiding in plain sight. How to tell the scar and not the wound. Why the part you keep hiding is the part she needs most. And how to point your story at her, so she becomes the hero, not you.

Plus one simple action you can take tonight to find the story only you can tell.

Mentioned in this episode: the Activate Your Calling seminar, happening this Wednesday. Details and your next step are linked below.

Take the free Calling and Capacity Audit at theresacroftaudit.com.

Take the Calling and Capacity audit here.

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Transcript

The Part You Keep Leaving Out

Speaker 0:00

You have told the story before, the clean version, the one that skips the hard parts and lands on the win. But the woman who needs you is not waiting on your highlight reel. She's waiting on the part you keep leaving out of your story. Hey, I'm Theresa Croft, and welcome to the Stuck No More Voices podcast. I help Christian women leaders craft their story so it connects with the people they are called to serve. If this is your first time, do me a favor. Go ahead and hit Subscribe. It's a small thing, and it carries the voice further than you know.

Make Her The Hero

Speaker 0:37

So today I wanna talk something about how, what women get backwards. It's like you think you are the hero of your story. I used to think that to a certain degrees. But you are not. I realize you're not the hero. She is. The woman you are trying to reach, she is the hero. Your story is just a map that shows her the way, that you already walked it. So you can say, "My life is your survival guide." And when you tell it right, your story does two things at once. It shows her the fire that you come through, and it shows her that change is possible because it happened for you. That is what moves a woman from watching to actually doing something.

Find Your Story In Photos

Speaker 1:23

So let me give you four simple keys. The first one is, where do you even find your story? The next three are how to shape it, so stay with me. So I remember going to a speaker academy, and a friend of mine was, like, struggling to find her story 'cause she's, "Tee, my story isn't gory and..." but this happened to me just recently. I thought about where do you find your story? If you're wondering, most women go looking sometimes in the wrong place. They sit, and they try to think it up, like the story is hiding somewhere in their head. It is not. It's already recorded. You just have to go back and look. So here's the key to finding your story that I don't think you'll hear this anywhere else. Here it is. Open your photos. Most of your photos are stored by years, by faces. It's in your old albums, the pictures on the wall maybe. Your story is sitting right here in the faces and moments you've already lived. So this is what happened to me to make me really connect with this. A photo will not skip the hard parts. It holds its truth so long, enough for you to really see it. So for example, my daughter, who's now 28, sent me a picture of when she was about four, and her dad was in the background blowing off his Harley, and she was in the in the middle of the page. She had a big bucket, and she had pure joy. She wanted to help her daddy wash his Harley. I could tell by what was going on in the background that he didn't let her, but the joy on her face. Now, my daughter's now 28, and I look at that story, mostly focusing on the daughter, how she wanted always to please her dad, to pay attention to her, and it pained my heart. As I will be honest with you, I was so distant, almost unattached to my children, because I was in the coping game. I was in the survival mode of sharp remarks, abuse. I It pinged the very thing that I struggle with and I'm working through today. I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough as a mom That was a tough picture. Now, on a lighter note, give me one more example. Let's get on a lighter note. Here's a picture of pure joy. I don't know if you can see it without it. pure joy. We're on a podcast table, three... two of my best friends. So this picture, it represents laughter. I love to laugh, but the picture reminds me of something. Two best friends around a podcast. We're collaborating on the Why Circle podcast. So what do I see? I see a story of how it is possible to find good friends. I prayed Psalm 15 in the Passion translation for years when I didn't have good friends, because if I did have a good friend, someone in the house would be jealous. So I was just praying for those good friends, Psalm 15, and God brought them to me. literally, Elana is from South Africa, now in Canada. Yara is from Mexico, now in Texas. Come on, now. How can God do that? He can. So this brings just a pure story of God's faithfulness. There is a story of God's faithfulness in this. It's often a story I use on how to find friends, with Psalm 15 as the backdrop. So those are friends who celebrate me and don't just tolerate me. I think you get the idea. I love this exercise. So go to your photos. What do you feel? What emotions do you get? I get, pure joy and laughter and... What emotion... And then I look at my daughter's picture, and it's just oh, pained my heart, but I dealt with it. There's stories in there, and you're not making up a story. You are remembering one, and the photo is the backdoor to it.

Speak From Scars Not Wounds

Speaker 5:28

All right, it's key number two. Find the scar, not the wound. I'm really big on this. Now, the ones... To find the moment, you have to know you are already ready to share it, and this is the part you have to hear me on. A scar is healed. You can touch it. A wound still bleeds, and the message is messy, and no one hears anything 'cause you're bleeding. You're trauma dumping. So the story you tell is not one that hurts to say out loud. It's one you've already come through. Like for me, for four years, serious neurocycle help from one of the ladies in this picture, about my family situation. serious deconstruction to reconstruction. The scar is where she'll trust you. Speak from your scars, not your wounds, because she can see it. She can see you made it out on the other side.

Tell The Hidden Part Safely

Speaker 6:25

All right, let's go to key number three: tell the story you keep hiding. Here is the one that's might sting a little, the piece you keep leaving out, the part that feels too small or you feel too small in it. That is usually the exact place she needs you as you heal, even with the scar. You, you're thinking it protects you. Really, it just leaves her alone in the thing you already survive. So share it. You share it in a way that makes her feel safe, safe for you and safe for her. No performing, no oversharing, just the real thing, the real deal told well from a kind and compassionate heart.

Point The Story At Her

Speaker 7:17

Point number four: point at her, not at you. And here is the test for all of it. When you finish telling your story, ask yourself one question: Does she feel impressed or does she feel seen? Impressed makes you the hero. Seen makes her the hero, and you do not want her to admire your story. You want to help her find herself in it and think, "If Tee got through that, then just maybe, just maybe I can get through that." One last thing. This is the part underneath of it all, the real reason your story creates visibility. You went through something, and now you go around and say, "I get you. I've been where you are." When you speak to the woman you used to be, the right woman hears it. She feels understood before you pitch a thing to her. That's what draws her to your offers and your services. She feels something. There is a transformation in her heart when she hears your story. It's not the marketing, it's the understanding. Because behind every solution, she's looking there, she's looking for you. She's looking if, is this the real person? Is she really telling me a real story? It's the woman who already walked the road she is on. And what makes your help different from everyone else, she knows your story

Your Assignment For This Week

Speaker 8:57

So here's what I want you to do this week. It's not someday, this week. Open your photos tonight, scroll back, and stop on one picture that makes something rise in you, and just sit with it for a minute. Do not write a post. Do not make it pretty. Just find the moment, and I would say find Jesus in the moment, 'cause it may be really traumatic. That is the whole assignment, though, because you cannot tell a story you have not let yourself look at yet. You can't find a story when the wound, the picture just, the wound's open and you realize you need to work on it to have a scar. And remember this rule as you look. I said it again, speak from the scar, not the wound, the healed place, not the bleeding one. The part you keep hiding is usually the part she needs most, and when you tell it, point it at her, not at you. Let her be the hero.

Free Seminar Invitation And Closing

Speaker 9:59

Now, if this stirred something in you and you want to do this work with me, not alone, I have something coming up. This Wednesday, I am hosting the Activate Your Calling seminar. It... Yeah, it's this Wednesday of the date of the podcast. If you missed it, be looking. There'll be another one, but this is so exciting. We're already getting women into the seminar where we're gonna find your story together and turn it into a cat story. Oh, I'm sure he'll show up, and we're gonna we're gonna love to, have you in the room. Okay, he got me all flustered, but I'm gonna keep going. It is live, and it is free, and it's built for the woman who is done staying hidden. The link is in the show notes. I'd love to have you in the room. Details are in the show notes, along with one more way to take your next step. But hear me on this. Do not wait for Wednesday to start. Open your photos tonight. Find the one. The imperfect action beats perfect waiting every single time. You, my friend, were never assigned a crowd. You were assigned a field, a metron, a field with your name on it, and a story only you can tell, so go find it. I'm Theresa, and I'll talk to you in the next episode of the Stuck No More Voices podcast. If you hear the buzzer, my clothes are done drying. We are as real as it gets around here. All right, I'll talk to you soon.